


Manipulated

by Lemon_N_Lime



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Injury, Crying, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Gun Violence, Heavy Angst, Hostage Situations, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Hydra (Marvel), Implied/Referenced Suicide, Insomnia, Major Character Injury, Manipulation, Mental Anguish, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Mind Manipulation, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rescue, Serious Injuries, Shooting, Shooting Guns, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-24
Updated: 2018-03-24
Packaged: 2019-04-07 04:07:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14072562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lemon_N_Lime/pseuds/Lemon_N_Lime
Summary: The reader begins to act differently. The Avengers think they're ill little do they know Hydra is up to no good again.





	1. Chapter 1

Your breath came in short bursts as you began to hyperventilate. Your heart thudded quickly against your ribcage and the sound of blood rushing through your veins filled your ears as you faced the tall menacing figure in the dark.

"PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!" You screeched at the stranger. 

Your weary eyes played tricks on your brain morphing the image of Bucky into the heartless Winter Soldier. Sour memories replayed themselves on a movie reel projected in your mind.

Your unstable legs began walk you backwards. You stumbled into a coffee table and began finding your way around using your arms, never breaking eye contact with the opponent. Your legs finally gave up and you collapsed onto your knees. With shaking hands, you reached for the handgun laying on the glass coffee table and aimed at the person casting a large intimidating shadow across the living room. Your quivering fingers slipped from the trigger a few times until you managed to control the adrenaline coursing through your veins just enough to hold the weapon steady in your hands.

"YOU HURT ME ONCE, YOU WON'T HURT ME AGAIN! THIS TIME I'M ARMED! THIS TIME I'M READY FOR YOU!" You yelled viciously at the stranger. 

With that final statement you pulled the trigger with an animalistic growl.

As soon as the bang resonated through the tower hallways you snapped our of your reverie. That's when you realized the shadow had collapsed to the ground whimpering in pain. You cautiously crawled towards the being with the gun still secure in your grasp. A gasp left your lips as you recognized Bucky with his face contorted in agony. Velvet droplets seeped through his fingers as he held his hand up to the gunshot wound. Your mind was detatched from your body and voice as you heard yourself scream for help. The gun fell to the ground with a metallic clang and your arms moved against your will to stop the bleeding you had caused. A look of horror plastered your face as your gaze landed on the crimson flowers quickly spreading across Bucky's shirt. Your eyes followed the trail of red until it poured onto the carpet, the blood spreading like a wildfire red tainting each thread in a matter of seconds.

Tears blurred your vision and the world became a swirl of shadows and blood. A lump began to grow in your throat which constricted your breathing. Oxygen was only coming in insubstantial bursts causing your head to swim and the ground beneath you began to sway and tip like the deck of a boat in a storm.

Your head found it's way to the floor and the thud of panicked footsteps filled your ears. You could barely make out the silhouettes of legs bending over you and Bucky before the welcomed darkness encased you in it's cold embrace singing you the lullaby of tortured shrieks from your past.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You wake up to blinding hospital lights and the beep of the heart rate monitor. You also wake up in a crappy mood and try to avoid everyone. Includingthe gossiping nurses.

Fluorescent hospital lights blinded you as you slowly opened your heavy eyelids. A faint but steady beep of the heart rate monitor continued to play on a continuous loop as you became aware of your surroundings. Odd machines and wires surrounded you creating the illusion of a throne made of standard, industrial, hospital machinery. Much to your disappointment, the faded and ratty chair beside you lay empty. Your clothes lay folded on the bedside table along with your accessories and loose items packed on top in a sad Ziploc bag. You looked longingly at the side table wishing there was a cup of water for you to down. The inside of your mouth felt like the dry cracked ground of the Arizona deserts. As you waited patiently for a nurse to visit your room, you fiddled with your hands trying to remember the events of last night. Your eyes began to glaze over and your fidgeting came to a halt as vivid images of Bucky's injured body bleeding away began to take over your thoughts. Your eyes dropped to your cold hands laying on your lap. How could you have harmed a human being? Let alone your best friend? Just as questions began to overwhelm you a short woman with navy blue scrubs came in. Her short black hair was tied tight at the back of her head and her face was pinched with stress. She picked up the clipboard at the end of your bed "It looks like you can leave, just get dressed and head to the main desk to sign out." She said exhaustion lacing her statement. 

You thanked her with a hoarse voice. Just before she left the room she informed you of the water fountain around the corner. With a huff you swung your legs over the edge of the bed and reached for your belongings. Your entire body felt stiff and rusty as you slipped on your clothes. Just as you left the bathroom with the Ziploc bag in your hand, you felt your phone ring. The caller ID read 'Capsicle'. 

"Hello?" You asked.

"Hey (Y/N) you're up!" Steve exclaimed into the receiver. "Do you need somebody to pick you up from the Hospital, because a nurse contacted me saying that you were cleared to leave?"

It slowly dawned on you that you did not in fact have a means of getting back to the compound so you took Steve up on his offer. With casual "See ya later"s you shut your phone off and walked towards the main desk.

"Hi, I was told to sign out before I left." You stated towards the nurses that stood each with one knee bent, hand on one hip, and gossip spilling out of their mouths.

"What's your name?" One of them asked reaching for the mountain of clipboards.

You gave them your name with an unamused face. You just wanted to leave this government funded building and hardcore nap in your fluffy bed at the Tower.

It took them twenty minutes just to find your file, you even had to spell both your first and last name out letter by letter three times. You could wait but those nurses were gnawing at your remaining patience. You gratefully took a step out of the Hospital eager to breathe fresh air filled with the scent of flowers and trees rather than the stuffy hospital air tinged with a distinct cleaning chemical and antibacterial soap. As you stepped out from under the awning your once content face was met with heavy droplets of rain slapping against your head in mockery. You wrapped your thin cotton mahagony coloured hoodie around your shivering wet frame and ducked back under the minimal coverage the awning provided you with. After waiting a long and dreadful half an hour you finally saw Steve pull up in one of Tony's shiny sleek black vehicles.

"Sorry to keep you waiting so long in the rain." Steve apologized as you entered the car.

"It's fine." You replied with a sigh as you welcomed the newly acquired warmth of the car.

"Did you want to see Bucky?" Steve asked with a furrow between his brows.

You needed to know if he was okay but you wanted to keep your distance especially after last night's accident. So you responded with a defeated "No".

As if reading the thoughts flowing through your head, Steve said "Bucky's alright. He'll survive but you got him pretty good. Did you want to talk about last night?"

"Not really." You muttered looking out at the grey and gloomy city through the window as rain drops rolled down the glass.

Silence filled the car as you drove through the parking lot and pulled onto the highway. It wasn't until Steve parked the car in the Tower's garage when he spoke again "I'm just gonna say what everyone's been thinking the past couple of months. You're sick, you can't deny that any longer. Everyone saw that it was only a matter of time before somebody got hurt. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, I just want you to know that we're here for you."

With that he got out of the car leaving you sitting in the darkness. You took a deep breath and made your way to the lift. Although you wanted to hide in your room and try not to make any contact with any being for the next few weeks, you needed food in your system so you took a side trip to the kitchen. With crossed fingers you entered hoping that nobody would be in the kitchen to interrogate you on the scene you made in the living room. As you lifted your eyes you were met with Tony standing by the coffee maker, back to you and scrolling through his phone. You could have tried to make a quick and quiet escape, unfortunately you took a gulp which echoed through the empty kitchen and made Tony turn around.

"You!" He jabbed a finger in your direction staring you straight in the eyes. "You made a mess on my carpet!" 

"Yeah I'll pay for that, with the money I don't have." You uttered in a tone seething with sarcasm. 

"You" He started, you held your breath expecting another offensive comment, to your surprise he added with sincerety " You also need to get better." which was the last thing you expected him to say. 

Cap had probably ordered everyone to treat you nicely, or you scared the shit out of the team and they're trying not to get on your bad side.

"Do you really mean it?" You questioned not believing him.

"I really mean it. No it's not Cap and no it's not you. You're obviously sick and we as a team need you back to tip top shape." He said then added "And I need you to get better so I don't have to worry about you killing the barista downstairs and forgetting my coffee!"

He walked out with his overworshipped caffeinated drink leaving you wordless. You never realized that you had such an impact. You thought the Avengers were just your coworkers but you're slowly realizing that they are family.

You grabbed a prepackaged sandwhich from the fridge and some fruit from the counter and headed back to your room.

To kill time you scrolled through social media and played a few video games then tried watching the news but found it to devastating and shut it off. You gazed up at the tiffany blue clock that let out a comforting tick tick. It was around the time dinner was served so you gathered your wits and cautiously headed downstairs. When you entered the dining room you were met with some weary stares, and some casual greetings. All which you welcomed but surviving through dinner and not going all assasin was your main goal, then you could sleep and all would be well for at least a few hours.

Dinner was less painful as you expected mainly because you ignored questions being thrown in your direction. Steve also backed you up by telling the others that you needed space and that you were tired.

You now lay awake in the darkness, staring up at the glow in the dark stars that you taped to your ceiling. Your body was beyond exhausted but your mind refused to shut off. A feeling of restlessness took over and your heart thudded against your chest. Your heart felt hollow and you began to wonder how Bucky was doing. Bucky's wellbeing was your only thought now. As you slipped on a pair of jeans and a sweater, you grabbed your purse and headed into the hallway. Before you reached the elevator Steve's familiar voice bounced off the corridor walls as he asked where you were going.

"I'm visiting Bucky at the hospital." You told him.

He nodded with a knowing look and reminds you to be careful.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You visit Bucky at the hospital.

When you entered the sliding glass doors, the distinct smell of rubbing alcohol and latex gloves greeted you. Steve had told you where Bucky was for the sake of your convenience. Visiting hours were obviously over seeing as it was late into the night but you wanted to see Bucky anyway. The moment the nurses left their station wether it be to check a patient or get coffee, you dashed across to the room that Bucky was presently being kept in. You entered the dark room spotting the dark outline of a person on the hospital bed who was distinctly Bucky. 

Tony was willing to pay for the hospital fees, which meant Bucky got his own private suite instead of sharing a room full of sick, dying or recovering people. 

It was quiet in the small room besides the reassuring beep of the heart rate monitor, and Bucky's snores. You slid into an uncomfortable chair placed in between the bed and the window. Your heart clenched at the sight of broken soldier and tears once again threatened to spill from your eyes. You did this, it was all your fault for Bucky lying here in the dark alone. You reached your cold hand out to hold Bucky's hand. 

"I'm sorry Buck." You whimpered into the dark. "Cap says I'm sick, I know that, I know that I need to get help but I can't bring myself to do it."

Hot, salty tears were streaming freely down your face, wetting your cheeks and dripping down your chin onto your once dry sweater. You had to cover your mouth with both hands to muffled your cries before anyone heard that you were in the room.

"Hey, hey, don't cry." you heard Bucky whisper in your direction. "I'm fine, I'm gonna be fine." 

Bucky reaches out for your hand. You grab on like your life depends on it.

"It's gonna take a little more than one small bullet to take down a super soldier like me." He jokes to try and lighten the mood. "Okay?"

"Okay." 

You sniffle and Bucky reaches out to wipe the tears off your face with a grunt.

"I'm still gonna stay here to make sure you don't die on me in the middle of the night." You say with a shaky voice.

"That's fine by me, a littke company never hurt anyone."

Bucky stayed silent after that. You reveled in the comforting silence of the room. Eventually you drifted off into a deep sleep that never once was plagued by a horrid nightmare.


	4. Chapter 4

(TO BE CONTINUED)


End file.
